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GRE Issue Essay: Educational Institutions Have A Responsibility To Dissuade Students - With A Free Essay Review



PROMPT: “Educational institutions have a responsibility to dissuade students from pursuing fields of study in which they are unlikely to succeed. Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.”

The recommendation presents a view that I would agree as it is the responsibility of the educational institute to directs the students for their better future as the mentors in the institution are experienced and know students ability in particular subject but we cannot turn our face against the fact that Dr. Stephan Hawking being tetraplegical wrote the bestseller books, Beethoven composed the popular music even if he has hearing deficiencies. So the correct claim should be Educational institutions have the responsibility to motivate students to pursue any kind of field of study, even the ones which they are unlikely to succeed, because there are always exceptions to prove that even with difficulties someone can be successful.

However, it is also necessary to guide the students in the case when they are dreaming unrealistic dreams and give them the correct direction for their successful future by saving them from day dreaming.

But at the same time there are few characteristics that an individual should have in order to win his laurels but history shows us that there are few exceptions like master blaster Sachin Tendulkar, it was believed that for being a good cricketer good height should be high but he proved it wrong being the only cricketer reaching his 100th century score.

The another example which stands tall is the richest man Bill Gates who dropped out off his college and started working and soon in 1975 he got his Micro-soft.

In contrast with the statement, we can see that it was believed that women cannot work in the offices but today we find that women are walking hand in hand with men to complete the tasks.

Hence from the above conversation it is clear that if students choose their own field of studies they will turn their errors into account. And avoid sitting on fence with their ideas and the recommendation from others. So I end up saying that it is the responsibility but not necessity to decide the student’s future.

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ESSAY REVIEW

You begin your first paragraph by saying that you agree with the original statement, and you end that paragraph by disagreeing with it. Generally, your essay’s argument is unclear, in part because of contradictions of the kind I’ve just mentioned, and in part because of language problems. It’s difficult to do much about the latter without undertaking a systematic review of English grammar, and devoting a lot of time to reading English prose, but unless you do that, you will have a difficult time doing well in the writing section of the GRE examination.

I’m afraid I cannot say much about your essay beyond the fact that it contradicts itself and makes claims that I don’t really understand. I’m not sure what you mean, for instance, when you say, trying to resolve the contradictions, that “it is the responsibility but not necessity.”

The prompt concerns whether educational institutions have a specific responsibility. Your task is not merely to come up with examples that might support one view of that statement, but to advance specific reasons based in an attempt to address what are the relevant issues. Why should educational institutions attempt to influence students in the suggested way? What would students, society, and the institutions themselves stand to lose or gain if institutions assumed or failed to assume that responsibility? Is there anyone else who ought to assume that responsibility? Does your view of the proposal depend on who would be funding the student’s education? These are the types of questions you would need to address in order to begin to answer the prompt.

Best, EJ
Submitted by: tishakariya
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