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Why Is Thomas Jefferson The Best American Man - With A Free Essay Review



[This is an argumentative essay. I am stating how Jefferson is a great American man who contributed to our nation in many ways. Please review by tomorrow at 7:30 a.m.! I really need this review! Thanks! You guys are the best!!!]

Thomas Jefferson, our third president of the United States contributed lots to our nation. Some may have never heard about Jefferson, and some may have. Thomas Jefferson was born on April 13, 1743, and would soon become one of our nations’ Founding Fathers. He was inaugurated into office on March 4, 1801. In his speech, he said that men are equal and should be treated equal. Years before he became president, he drafted the Declaration of Independence which stated our independence from Great Britain; in 1803, Jefferson persuaded Congress to purchase the Louisiana Territory from France; and limited federal governments’ rights in order to increase states’ power and American liberty.

The Declaration of Independence was written after the Revolutionary War with Britain. The Declaration of Independence stated our freedom from Britain. The authors’ of the Declaration of Independence was Thomas Jefferson. Benjamin Franklin and John Adams also contributed to the Declaration of Independence by coming up with ideas that are included in the document. Jefferson wrote this document as a result of King George the third’s rule over America during a period of time. Everyone in America was treated as slaves; therefore, Jefferson decided to write a document that protected our rights. Some may argue that Jefferson was a hypocrite during his presidency because he held slaves in his custody. However, he did free two slaves in his lifetime and eventually freed all the slaves in his will. The only reason he had slaves was because his plantation, which his father passed down onto him, needed aid, and slaves were the right ones for the job.

Has anyone ever wondered how our country became as large as it is today? It is all thanks to Thomas Jefferson. During his presidency, he bought the Louisiana Territory, which included the entire west portion of the current United States. In 1803, Congress and Napoleon Bonaparte, French president, made a compromise stating that France will sell the Louisiana Territory for about fifteen million dollars. Jefferson obliged to the plan, and the two countries signed a treaty. Taking out fifteen dollars from the nation was a huge downfall. Then, Jefferson was blamed for the economic loss because of the Embargo Act of 1807. The Embargo Act of 1807 prohibited any trade connections with foreign countries. During this time, France and Britain had a war. France proclaimed that America could not trade with Britain, and the same with Britain. Jefferson passed the Embargo Act of 1807 thinking that it would stop the restrictions of foreign trade, but he was proved wrong. Jefferson soon realized that this was a horrible idea and repealed the act in 1809. This may be one of his flaws, but the Louisiana Purchase doubled our nation’s size. Jefferson also supported the Lewis and Clark expedition, that helped mapped the west territory that led people settling in the new territory. In addition, the Louisiana territory expanded our nation to what it is today.

Additionally, Thomas Jefferson was the first president to favor states’ rights and not federal governments’ rights. Being in office, Thomas Jefferson changed a variety of matters that were Democratic ideas to Republican ideas. He limited the federal governments’ rights and gave power to the states’. By doing so, citizens were able to vote for president and candidates for office. However, Thomas Jefferson was centered towards Republican power. He stopped the Midnight Judges that previous President Adams assigned to the Supreme Court. Adams wanted to appoint the Midnight Judges, which were Democratic, thus the Democrats would still obtain some power in office. This was definitely a self-centered act. Everyone has flaws, and so can presidents. Despite this vile act, President Jefferson did allow the many citizens of the states’ to hold power in office no matter what they were ranked. Consequently to Jefferson’s consideration to the people, we have the power to vote for the delegates of office.

In conclusion, Thomas Jefferson was a memorable man who contributed a significant amount towards our nation. By drafting the Declaration of Independence, and freeing all his slaves, we came to have the freedom that we would have today. Our nation has expanded to its vast size because of the Louisiana territory that was bought by Jefferson in 1803. Even though that act resulted in a big debt that our country had to pay, it was worth the economic depression. Being a Republican president, Thomas Jefferson put Republican delegates on office. He gave a majority of the seats in Congress and the Supreme Court to Republicans, giving birth to the Democrat and Republican parties. Lastly, Thomas Jefferson gave powers to the states’, and people, and limited the governments’ power.

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ESSAY REVIEW

I am sorry that we were unable to meet your urgent deadline; I hope the review will be of some interest to you nonetheless.

This is, as you say, an argumentative paper, which means it should not just be a list of facts, as it seems mostly to be, even if the facts are the kinds of facts that will lead your reader to think that Jefferson was wonderful. To write an argument, you need ideally to articulate a claim that is arguable, something about which reasonable people might disagree.

A good essay should also, ideally, consider possible objections to your argument from those hypothetical “reasonable people,” which is what you admirably do when you consider the objection that Jefferson was a slave-owner. However, your defense of his being a slaveholder is weak. Since there is no justification for keeping slaves, any justification will be weak, but it is particularly weak to claim that he needed slaves to run his plantation (he needed workers to run his plantation, and apparently preferred not to hire workers). Perhaps the best way to proceed here would be to acknowledge that in this respect Jefferson was flawed, like many of his compatriots, and perhaps less so than many of his compatriots.

After dealing with slavery, you change topics very abruptly (you need to work on transitions) to the purchase of the Louisiana Territory. Your argument here is that Jefferson was great because he bought the territory that made America a larger country. I think you need to do more than that. Specifically, you need to explain what in general was great about doing that. What, for instance, did Jefferson understand or have the vision to foresee with respect to the purchase that others of his time did not? What quality of greatness, in other words, is revealed in the decision to purchase the territory.

The next paragraph is poorly organized, and the bit about the Midnight Judges seems like a distraction to me. As before, I think you need a general way of describing the importance of what Jefferson did and explaining in what way that makes him great. It is not enough just to list the deeds performed; you need to create specific links between those deeds and your overarching argument about Jefferson the Great.

The conclusion is a bit pedestrian and repetitive, so again try to find a general way of articulating the man’s achievement; but if you are going to repeat the deeds, note that “freeing his slaves” is merely better than “not freeing his slaves” and not a sign of greatness.

Best, EJ.
Submitted by: exokbacon
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