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GRE Issue 43: The Increasingly Rapid Pace Of Life - With A Free Essay Review
PROMPT: “The increasingly rapid pace of life today causes more problems than it solves. Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.”
The statement claims that the increasingly rapid pace of life today causes more problems than it solves. It goes without saying that the rapid pace of life has increased greatly at present. A large number of people take cars, buses or subways to go to work rather than on foot. The rapid development of communications also increase people’s pace of life, enabling them to exchange thoughts and information at a dramatically high speed. However, while the rapid pace of life solves problems, including promotion of work efficiency, it also causes large amounts of problems which never occurred in the past. From my perspective, to some extent, the increasingly rapid pace of life today causes more problems than it solves.
Due to the rapid development of technology, the pace of life is much faster than in the past. With the advanced transportation, especially airplanes, people can travel to different parts of the world within 24 hours, which bring much convenience to businessmen, travellers or even athletes. It solves many problems. For example, in the past, athletes might take a ship much earlier than the beginning of a tournament for the purpose of not being late. Sometimes, it would take athletes nearly a month to reach the destination, making them tired and spiritless. However, they need not worry about this problem any longer because they would spend more time on preparation and acclimation owing to the benefits from airplanes. The advance of the mass media, for instance, also makes great contributions to rapid pace of life. Owing to the internet, television and satellite, information is exchanged tremendously fast, which solves several serious problems, such as the immediate accessibility to information from distant places and the effective way of information exchange. Therefore, because of rapid pace of life the progressive technology brings, people can save lots of time and improve the efficacy and efficiency of work.
However, the increasingly rapid pace of life today also causes some troubles. The rapid pace of life not only indirectly puts a heavy burden on people, but also causes health or even psychological disorders. Nowadays, people are always busy working and have little time to spend relaxation. In China, people, especially urban citizens with rapid pace of life, seldom stroll in the park after meals or do some work out in the morning. In order to save time, people often eat junk food and are more likely to suffer from obesity. Worse still, in the era of knowledge explosion, people who do not spend much time on work may soon be outdated and fired by bosses. Thus, large amounts of workers take great pains to absorb information all day long, leaving themselves little freedom to do what they are really interested in. Hence, rapid pace of life also influence people negatively and unfavorably.
In conclusion, although the increasingly rapid pace of life today solves more problems, it causes more problems.
This is your thesis statement: "to some extent, the increasingly rapid pace of life today causes more problems than it solves." (Note that "to some extent" doesn't make sense here.) I think that the only thing your essay tries to show is that the rapid pace of life solves some problems and it causes other problems. The essay doesn't make an explicit argument about whether the problems caused are more significant or more numerous than the problems solved.
The conclusion to your second paragraph is a little odd, at least with respect to the claim that the rapid pace of life "can save a lot of time." What you have really tried to show is that the rapid pace of life is enabled by the way in which technology can save time or allow us to do things more quickly. The rapid pace of life doesn't itself save a lot of time; it is itself, in part, the phenomenon of time being saved on many tasks, allowing us to do many more tasks.
Clearing up this point will also allow you to avoid the apparent contradiction between the claim that the rapid pace of life can save time and the claim, in the next paragraph, that the rapid pace of life is defined by our having "little time to spend on relaxation." You need to make sure throughout the essay that you do not confuse "technological progress" with "rapid pace of life." They are not synonymous.
Technological progress creates the rapid pace of life by, for instance, allowing information to be "exchanged tremendously fast," as you claim. Now you say this solves problems, but you don't really identify problems that it solves. To say that information being exchanged fast solves the problem of "effective ... information exchange" is not really to say anything; it's just a tautology, and even if it were not, the problem would not be one that has been solved by the rapid pace of life, but by technological developments.
What you need to ask is what the rapid pace of life (defined in part by the phenomenon of the rapid exchange of information) enables to happen. What problems does having an effective way to quickly exchange information solve or cause.